Kalki Koechlin – ‘Five husbands? we have adequate difficulty with one’

Kalki Koechlin – ‘Five husbands? we have adequate difficulty with one’


Bollywood singer Kalki Koechlin who was a partial of a India Today Conclave 2014 that took place in New Delhi on Saturday, wrote a clever digression for a solo performance, on a arise of International Women’s Day on Mar 8. The digression is a undone paper to women, that she dubbed as ‘Just Another Rant’.

Read a full content of her monologue:

“You remember in a beginning?

In a commencement God done man.

God done male in his possess image.

And afterwards that’s was it. ‘Man’kind, hu’man’ity, wo’man.

Man, man, man.

What possibility in Hell did we ever have?

We were sidelined from a Big Bang.

You remember Draupadi?

Draupadi married off to all 5 Pandavas.

She garlanded usually Arjun

But they told her we got to marry all of us.

Five husbands! That can’t be fun.

God know we have adequate difficulty with one.

Or what about Eve and a apple?

Blaming one lady for all mankind’s evil?

Soorya and Kunti,

The Virgin Mary

Do we know Gaia?

The Goddess Mother Earth

She’s a one we all raid on.

And remember Aphrodite

Goddess of adore and beauty

Lest we forget, she was also

The enthusiast of prostituting.


She was reduction known

Raped by Hades

She became Queen of a underworld,

Not even goddesses were left alone.

You competence not know A’isha,

She was one of a wives of Prophet Mohammad

She challenged a Califh for power

It combined utterly a ruckus,

It led to fight in fact,

All given of one woman’s fuss,

And so was innate a tradition Islamic

That women should not rivet in anything politic.

But of march they did,

Thank God they did.

Women have their ways,

As somebody once put it.

The Queen of Sheba, Empress Theodora, Rabia al’ Basra,

Cleopatra, The Victorian Era, The Mona Lisa

The Suffragettes, Marilyn Monroe, The sixties and blazing bras,

The unpopular Thatcher and a possess Indira

Et cetra et cetra and now here we are.

Here we are,

We’ve survived this far,

Thanks to seduction, maybe some manipulation,

But mostly interjection to Mother Nature and ovulation.

Now demeanour during all a queens and goddesses of history,

No aristocrat came to a rescue,

No aristocrat ever went down on one knee,

No deity was even that trustworthy,

Yet all we’ve be told given we were three,

Are angel tales, adverts, and flattering stories,

Telling us to pray, hope,

And wait to be saved.

Here we are today.

Here we are,

On International Women’s Day,

With some teenager disappointments,

And a few small things to say.

The lady in red,

The lady in pink,

The widow in white,

The Burqa in black,

The colour of lipstick,

Viva Glam, Lady Danger, Fresh brew, Faux, Frenzy, Hot Gossip and Sweetie.

Ramblin, Siss, Creme cup, Paramount and Modesty

Fetish, Spice it up, Naked Paris, Honey adore and Odyssey.

Apply, line, smack, seal, pout,

And you’re prepared to go out.


Sometimes we only wish an oversized T shirt, fighter shorts, careless hair and unibrows.

I wish armpit hair prolonged adequate to plait,

I wish a purify face but a snippet of make up

I wish to demeanour a approach we do when we arise up.

I wish to blemish my head,

Dig my nose,

Lick my fingers,

Stretch my legs

And widespread my toes.

I wish to grin with my gums showing,

Bare my teeth and

Contort my flattering face into wrinkles.

I wish my crow’s feet to demeanour sexy,

Or my salt and peppers hair,

Or my object burnt skin,

I wish to be George Clooney basically,

But with breasts and a muffin.


No…no…shhh…control, control!

Keep it down.

Stuff it up, bottle it in, switch it off,

Cross your legs, wear a bra,

Sit true and grin sweetly for a camera.

I went to a party,

I went to a celebration where

I was looking for something real.

Glittering, flashing lights,

Sparkling purify eyeglasses with something bubbly and costly inside,

Stuck on smiles of embellished lips and gorgeous, skinny, pleasing ladies all around,

I craved a touch, a caress,

But my senses were intimidated by cloned perfection.

I suspicion we could hear muffled wailing,

Nervous giggling,

Intoxicated complying.

I suspicion we could hear a hum of millions, screaming out their instructions,

Sit down, mount up, stay,

This way, that way, go away

I can’t breathe, I’m choking.

This room is filled with smoke

From regrets and weak, easily finished cigarettes.

This room is filled with oppulance and fame

And fake dreams.”

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Article source: http://bollywood.celebden.com/2014/03/10/kalki-koechlin-five-husbands-i-have-enough-trouble-with-one/